My Toxic Life

Tomato soup
My fallback comfort food: tomato soup and grilled cheese sandwich.

I am presently suffering the agonies of mid-winter flu. Typing is exhausting and my brain is all a-fog with the unwashed desire to return to bed. I also suffer the angst of once again being homeless.*

The home that almost was, isn’t any more. The inspection turned up enough accumulative unknown repairs to make the purchase cost prohibitive. Added to that, the home turned out to be radioactive. (Okay, I exaggerate, but it helps me to think it was a toxic environment that I am better off rid of.) The inspection report showed Radon.

On the other hand, I’d make a kick-ass Wonder Woman.

For those of you who don’t know what radon is…you need to educate yourselves. It is a natural gas that is a “colorless, radioactive, inert gaseous element formed by the radioactive decay of radium.”  ( Now, I’d love to develop super powers as much as the next girl, but unfortunately, radiation only does that in cartoons. Radon is the number two cause of lung cancer leading to deaths by the thousands every year. It can be found anywhere. But in my particular case, it turned up in the inspection report, sealing the doubts I had based on the myriad other things wrong with the building—the fact that the roof wasn’t entirely attached being one of them. This means I am back to house hunting and the market has been picked clean.**

I am weepy with being ill for two…(wait, what day is it?)…three days. I am depressed that the house I was hoping was perfect for me, isn’t. I am tired of looking at the real estate site only to see all the other houses I liked have gone to less indecisive buyers. I have been living on cookies and hot chocolate for days…and I have just run out of cookies.

Chicken Soup
This would have been a lot more comforting if it hadn’t been frozen solid from sitting in the garage all winter.

I could use a hug. And chicken soup. And a house.


Asterisk Bedazzled Footnote:

*’Cause nothing warms the soul like hyperbole.

**Like the Thanksgiving Turkey on Friday, the only houses left are the neck bones of that analogy. And nobody wants to live in a neck bone.

21 thoughts on “My Toxic Life

    1. It would be nice if I could take advantage of being at home, but alas, I am a parent. Having a child is a lot like having Stockholm Syndrome–you have to keep pleasing the one holding you captive and you can’t help but love them to keep yourself sane.

      Liked by 1 person

  1. Hope you’re feeling much better today already! I learned all about radon when I was buying our last house up north…all houses in the area had radon, more or less. The previous owner had already installed a radon remediation system to the house we bought. And it worked very well.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Tiny, thanks for the inspiring thoughts. If the house hadn’t had many more things wrong with it, I might have relaxed on the radon issue, but it had enough strikes to make me walk away with little regret. I suspect I have an impulse control issue when it comes to making an offer too quickly. Fortunately, I am learning the cost of impatience. ($500/inspection.)


  2. 1. This post is now days and days old. Perhaps you worsened, and levity is inappropriate. No worries. Mine will likely fall flat, as you may already have. (Oh, no she didn’t!!)

    I DO hope you are all better now. And that you didn’t spread your nasty germy microbes to the other family members.

    2. It is disgusting that you still write so very well when you are ill.

    3. It is also envy-inducing that you found an inspector who actually finds what you are paying her/him to find. None of mine ever have. Worthless all, and many friends and acquaintances have said the same of theirs. Feel the sunshine n that one virtual way, at least, for you are blessed there, and it will save you thousands upon thousands–not to mention endless time and stress.

    3. Radon, schmadon. All bricks emit it, and thus all Chicagoans and Brooklynites should be dropping like prematurely-dead flies. Don’t smoke, eat healthful foods, try not to live near a busy street (those particulates are bad for a host of cancers), look before you cross, drink small amounts of red wine or grape juice, meditate, and, above all, remember:

    Too much sitting to blog or read the blogs of others will kill you sooner than anything.


    House prices in Orange County have dropped. As goes OC, so goes the nation. Sell now, move into a ice-house on a pond somewhere, wait for prices to plummet. If you survive the winter, you’ll be sittin’ pretty.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Already feel like I am living in an ice pond. Michigan temperatures have been hovering at and just below zero for over a week now. (Excellent accompaniment to having a fever for about the same amount of time.) I have lost and am now recovering my voice. Blogging is all I have left to live for, don’t try to take it away from me. (And yes, inspector is worth his weight in gold. Now if only I could just afford to send him to find me a house, then I could be happy-ish.)

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I have no A/C for the second year in a top-floor condo in L.A. I am really looking forward to the warmer weather.

    Sorry you’ve been so ill. I had my first cold in fifteen years last year (I have always thought my hyperactive autoimmune system wipes out puny minor viruses–take THAT, cold bug–you ARE common!!). Hated my only three days of stuffy nose. Don’t know what I’ll do if I get something like you’ve had. Not be blissfully blogging, that’s for d#mn sure.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. One measly cold in 15 years? What the hell kind of alien are you? I have at least two to three every winter. I felt pretty victorious to go most of December and January sick-free.


      1. Okay, serious now: I got a serious, nasty case of bronchitis every f#cking year that lasted for 2-3 MONTHS. Then, in the early 90s, just for fun, I had my nasal septum partially undeviated (I say partially because the job was not poifect. Had it been, I could pronounce that word better.)

        Lo and be-no-cold! NEVER since have I had bronchitis!

        So: Should it happen that you have ANY sort of imperfection in the shape of your nasal passages–whether a slightly deviated septum, or smaller-than-average sinuses–I strongly suggest you visit your best Yelp-reviewed Roto-Rooter for the Tooter and ream that puppy out. Then see what the coming year brings.

        I hope you find that this is the drain cause of your problem, also.

        Oh: And never neglect spraying Lysol in the air, wrapped up indoors in Michigan. Those germies are so happy swirling around you in that warm, moist, indoor environment. I lived with an old couple for a while, and they were constantly falling ill with colds. I bought cans of Lysol and sprayed every few days–surfaces AND air. Their colds stopped. Maybe give that a whirl, too.

        Good luck.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Um…Kiri, to be fair, and “represent” for folk everywhere who have both lupus and Behcet’s disease (I’m the only one I know of, but maybe there are others), I HAVE had OTHER medical fun BESIDES colds.(she said, typing this while experiencing some of that fun at this very moment).

        “STFU [Shush The Fudge Up], kidneys!”

        Liked by 1 person

  4. I won’t try to compete with that. I was comparing colds with colds. Anything that affects the kidneys is going to beat any hand I’ve been dealt. Some day, when you tire of California sunshine, come on out to the wilds of Michigan (I so don’t live in the wilds) and we’ll share a bottle of wine and exchange stories.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Well, I see I’m not the only Duh-Mistress around–or you’re just a selfish sot: I can’t imbibe more than a jot with wonky kidneys. The good side is, I’m a cheap date. (If I ever HAD a date. I’m headed off to cry into my be–Oh cr#p: That’s alcohol AND gluten. Sigh.)


      1. Sounds lovely. I am currently, and forever, ignoring Doctor A’s instructions to give up tea, and Doctor B’s instruction’s to abandon coffee, in favor of abandoning the multiplicands of the hypotenuse, which have given me trouble before, as I recall.

        Liked by 1 person

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